The Literary Grinch who Purloined My POV - A Rant

Part One of Two Parts

They stood, swaying, the hall light turning them into a neon draped statue, their embrace a thing of chiseled granite. Kissing as if from first discovery on a shipwrecked island, they devoured one another. Gasping for air, her tears forlornly sought a channel between cheeks that were grafted together.

         I am going to marry this woman, he thought.

         God, I finally found him. Finally, finally, finally!  

Your job, should you accept it, is to critique the above scene, so reach for your blue pen.  (Pause here to re-read the above.)

Which did you mark up first—the hackneyed prose in the first four lines or the screeching POV issue embedded in the last two? The last two, you say? Just couldn’t resist? Ummm, no surprise. For those lines upturn one of the hallowed pillars of the literary temple, to wit: “Thou shalt not change POV without approval from the three branches of government.”

“Now hold on,” I can hear you saying. “This is a blatant, maniacal abrogation of one of the fundamentals dictums placed upon prose writers since the time of Epictetus (55-135 A.D.). All writers know that it is frowned on to change POV, period. Among literary liberals, however, there is a trend to change POV in conjunction with the beginning of a new chapter. Progressives, alas, are quite willing to introduce a new POV after a scene change. (One could ask: Who were their parents?) But, and I shudder to reveal it, there is a growing class of self-proclaimed writers—the wild-eyed radicals who have infiltrated our ranks whilst English professors the world over dithered over their soon to be published books. These radical denizens of prose are wont to change POV just any old bloody time it suits them! Refer to the last two lines of the sample text as an example.

Well. I am a follower of mystery writer Larry Beinhart. In his 1996 book, How to Write a Mystery, he speaks, in chapter six, to the principle of Clarity (emphasis added). “Clarity is the essence of all good writing,” he says. “Odd punctuation? Fragments of sentences? Nouvelle vocab and undictionaried words? All A-OK. If totally, and easily, comprehensible. If everyone who reads what you have written understands it correctly, it has been written correctly.” (Pages 60-61)